Search query:

witty answers

Found: 48
not a cunt, but a mystifier
borsch
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2016 06 17 19:44
36
RUSSIA St.-Petersburg
-Young man, are you picking on me? -how could you think that! To glue you, you must first be degreased
mdk
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2016 05 07 03:19
61
RUSSIA Moscow
-Do you pray before eating? - no, my wife cooks normally
sarkazm
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2016 04 24 12:17
16
RUSSIA Taganrog
there is an exam. professor: there are 500 bricks on board the plane. one brick fell out of the plane. How many bricks are left on board? student: well, that's easy! 499! professor: right. next question. how to put an elephant in the refrigerator in 3 steps? student: 1. open the refrigerator, 2. put the elephant in there. 3. close the refrigerator! professor: further. how to put deer in the refrigerator in four steps? student: 1. open the refrigerator. 2. pull out the elephant. 3. put the deer. 4. close the refrigerator! professor: great! next question. It's the birthday of the king of beasts, lion! All the animals came except one. Why? student: because the deer is still in the refrigerator! professor: great! Further. can granny walk through a swamp with crocodiles? student: of course he can! After all, all the crocodiles are at the lion's birthday! professor: good! and now the last question. Granny walked through an empty swamp, but still died! what happened to her? student: uh! did she drown? professor: but no! A brick fell on her, which fell out of the plane! for a "retake"!
solyanka
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2016 03 27 11:18
21
GEORGIA Tbilisi
what should I do in the army, I don’t know anyone there
mdk
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2016 03 23 08:17
33
RUSSIA Moscow
-Where do you see yourself in 5 years? -I was blinded by brilliant prospects.
sarkazm
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2016 03 13 09:06
20
RUSSIA Taganrog
-Darling, you will soon become a dad. -They called from the Vatican?!
leprum
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2016 02 23 03:27
18
KAZAKHSTAN Almaty
-Are you an idiot? - no, sir. I'm a dreamer.
leprum
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2016 02 23 03:25
27
KAZAKHSTAN Almaty
-give me a bottle of whiskey. -with myself? - no, without you.
prikol_xa
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2015 12 09 16:29
15
BELARUS Mogilev
two students. -Do you like learning matan? -He's like heroin to me. - hooked? -I have never tried it.
tima99
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2015 09 04 22:40
7
UKRAINE Odesa
The "clever responses" meme has become especially popular in recent years, particularly after the advent of smartphone screenshots featuring entertaining text message exchanges. These conversations resemble short jokes, relying upon a posed question and a surprising answer. Often, no image background is necessary for the conversation, as truly clever responses stand out on their own. These memes are popular across all user categories, as they are universal and fit different situations ("Where are you?" "Do you want me to answer in rhymes?"). Clever responses employ small jokes, idioms, and are built on contradictions and double entendres ("Why don't you take any care of yourself?" "I have absolutely no suspicions about myself!" or "Which is more interesting, a book or a movie?" "No, you!"). Clever responses will often use sharp language (sometimes with profanity), are frequently used, and delivered directly to the point in verbal exchanges ("My earring hole hurts," "Who's Serezhka?" or "Why doesn't a beautiful, intelligent, charming girl like you have a boyfriend?" "He died, b****!"). The "clever responses" meme is like pepper as a seasoning for a bland dish - some people like it, while others spit it out. But they are a wonder all the same.