-You are found guilty, your last word? -Comrade Judge, I have a hungry cat at home, there will be no one to feed it. -Why were you silent, you are completely justified
I'M REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO PUTIN'S NEW YEAR'S SPEECH. HE USUALLY SAYS THIS YEAR WAS HARD AND FULL OF DIFFICULTIES. THIS TIME HE WILL PROBABLY JUST STAND SILENTLY FOR 5 MINUTES, THEN TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND SAY THIS IS JUST FUCKING, AND THEN CHIMS.
I’m sitting in the traffic policeman’s car, he’s silent and I’m silent. then he says: why don’t you offer me anything? -marry me! -he laughed and let go.