丈夫和妻子

While your wife is at work, take out all her jars, creams, shampoos, scrubs and perfumes. Don't be afraid, fool, this is all for you: today you are a princess.

The husband wakes up after a brutal drinking session, looks, the linen is washed and ironed, hung on the high chair, breakfast and a bottle of beer on the table. the wife left for work without saying a word, without hysterics. he says to his son: son, what happened yesterday? Dad, you came home drunk at two in the morning and fell on the bed. and when your mother tried to undress you, you said: “Don’t touch me, bitch, I’m married!”

explanatory: “I was late for work because I climbed over my husband in the morning and was a little late...”

The husband runs home, grabs his wife by the hand.., into the bedroom, rushes and throws her on the bed... the wife is shocked.., this has not happened in 20 years. her husband falls towards her, covers them with a blanket over his head and says..: - look! I bought the watch...it glows.

-I heard you had to bury your wife? -What to do, she was dead.

If your husband offended you, do not be rude to him in return. nibble on the cookies on his side of the bed.

wife: - the hole in my earring hurts... husband: - who is this earring?!