муж

The husband wakes up after a brutal drinking session, looks, the linen is washed and ironed, hung on the high chair, breakfast and a bottle of beer on the table. the wife left for work without saying a word, without hysterics. he says to his son: son, what happened yesterday? Dad, you came home drunk at two in the morning and fell on the bed. and when your mother tried to undress you, you said: “Don’t touch me, bitch, I’m married!”

explanatory: “I was late for work because I climbed over my husband in the morning and was a little late...”

My husband tells me: “You won’t drink with your friends anymore!” and I look at him and joyfully think: so many years together, and how much optimism he still has...

-I heard you had to bury your wife? -What to do, she was dead.

husband, welcome home. I'm hiding inside with a toy gun, here's the second one... the loser is cooking dinner tonight. and may luck be with you. kisses, wife

If your husband offended you, do not be rude to him in return. nibble on the cookies on his side of the bed.

if my husband asks where all the money goes, I’ll do... this

- the man is not the one who fucked the women, but the one who kissed his son’s pepper! -I gave the grade for the pissyulka. -I personally kiss both my little ones on the pussies))))) damn, these are my favorite places!!! My daughter has a “pie”, and Timka has a “pepper”!!! I kiss my son so that my husband doesn’t see, otherwise he’ll get jealous