psychologist

normal people: psychologist, psychotherapist. me, who has no money: I say the word “fuck” every day, but it helps me

-Doc, I think I'm going crazy. -Did you just call me Doc? -It looks like the patient is having recursive hallucinations again. -I suggest electric shock or lobotomy

“if you put headphones on your nostrils and at the same time cover your ears, the oral cavity forms a speaker” - I was kicked out of my psychologist’s class for this crap

straightforward psychologist: -my father does not accept me for who I am. - It's a fucked up problem, isn't it?

you need to introduce elements of the game into sex

a psychologist is a person who looks at everyone else when a beautiful girl walks into the room.

-I think you need to drink and have sex. - I must say, you are a really good psychotherapist!

-Doctor, my husband drinks heavily and beats me brutally... what should I do? -maybe the problem is you?

-Doctor, I'm a designer. I see fonts everywhere. what should I do? -calm down! eat some more of these soft rolls and drink some tea.

-describe your condition. -I feel hopeless.