my face

my face when I said a non-violent toast

When I was a kid, when I got a computer, my favorite game was FIFA. I played it every day and beat other teams with ease. I thought I had achieved perfection. One day I invited a friend (he was two years older than me) to play together. Then he told me that all this time it was not me who was playing, but the computer, since before the match it turns out that I had to switch from the computer to the keyboard. you should have seen my face then. It turns out that for six months I stupidly watched team matches, poking at buttons. I haven't played FIFA since then.

my face when I sleep 3 hours a day

I took the wine from the store. I’m standing, choosing olives. the Gopnik security guard approaches. young man, you have a minute! I screw up my face from the series What the fuck? him: there is a minute left until 23.00 to buy alcohol! I immediately explode, jumping over the goods and rushing to the cash registers. he overtakes me - runs ahead - breaks through the road. At the checkout the line is parting: urgently! wine! cashier: oh, let me give it to you quickly - there’s only a minute left! just paid. Behind me, 2 people apart, there are guys with beer. cashier: oh my god. beer. they won't make it in time. gets up and shouts almost in panic: girls! punch the beer. 30 seconds left! This is what I call civil society.

my face when I'm stuck in traffic for the second hour

-Mom, why is there a napkin on my face? - leave me alone, I'm looking at my hand

When I returned home from work, I saw the cement that had not yet hardened in our basement, which was being renovated. and I did what any normal person in my place would do - imprint my face.

my face when a beautiful girl sat next to me on the bus

The pimples on my face form constellations. -why don’t you have a boyfriend? Blame the stars.

I bought a Samsung smartphone, the wind no longer blows in my face!