arma

me when my alarm goes off. me when my alarm doesn't go off.

7-year-old me, when I saw the sign “optics” instead of “pharmacy”: screw it, stupid adults, how can you make so many mistakes?

pedestrian, remember the driver is always hunting you!

mosquito trap

if fairy tales were published in the yellow press: “crazy fish brought pensioners to poverty!”, “a mutant child is forced to live underground!”, “the water in the puddles is poisoned by chemicals! The boy was an idiot, he became a brute!”, “the oligarch’s daughter lost her honor in a pigsty!", "the cyborg left the Swedish family without sweets!", "the famous showman was robbed by a well-hewn block of wood!", "due to the construction of a cottage village, the pensioner's country house was turned in the opposite direction from the picturesque forest!", "the demobilization tricked the pensioner into giving the latest products! the swindler used edged weapons!", "plastic surgery is an accomplice of kidnapping, seven children are missing!", "pensioner maniacs poisoned animals with baked goods with LSD!", "several miners held a young girl captive for a month! ", "a drug-addicted girl is being turned on by a rabbit!", "homeless animals share emergency housing!", "for a flower stolen by her father, the daughter had to become the wife of a mutant!", "an employee killed a clergyman with a click in the forehead!", "the girl used the petals of a plant as a powerful hallucinogenic!", "An animated nut cracker against a mutant rat! do not miss!"

when you watch how they make shawarma for you

One day in the cinema I will pluck up the courage and at the most dramatic moment of the film I will shout to the whole audience: problems with access to the joycasino?!

The diameter of Soviet cigarettes is 7.62mm, and this is not a joke. any Soviet production, within 2 hours, could be rebuilt for the production of cartridges

“it went in one ear, out the other”, “one leg here and the other there”, “I completely lost my head”

oh you naughty girl